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gruff-ioan.livejournal.comEDIT: Locked!!!
Gods...it's been a while since I've written anything in here...but really...you would too if you had a choice between a wonderful, amazing, gorgeous man and a comm. I mean really...the choice is quite simple to me. Wonderful, amazing, gorgeous man, thank you very much. I can't believe the path my life has taken...hell, winding up at Palace was enough. Mads? That's just unbelievable. I never imagined myself in what could most certainly be a lasting relationship. Never imagined myself in a relationship period. At least not at this stage in my life. And now I'm wearing his collar. Hell, the second of three. Who would ever have guessed this would happen? Not me. That's for sure. I mean...look at our first meeting...didn't go so hot. I rather despised him then, I think. Lord only knows what he thought of me. And now...I'm like a bleeding schoolgirl with her first crush. Except it's so much more than that. I've caught myself thinking about the future more than once...about how I've got 12 years of debt left...and 12 years is a long time...I don't know if I want to be doing this in 12 years...don't know if I could still be doing this in 12 years if things with Mads go the way they seem to be...it wouldn't seem right...wouldn't seem right to still be doing this after 12 years of being with someone. Regardless of what we've both grown up doing. Wanting to be with someone else outside of a client hasn't crossed my mind in...a while now. Since the first collar I think...and I love him...so very much, and I won't let something get in the way of that. He's what's important now. Not the job, not the money...Mads. And so help me...if that slimy twit ruins his job...ruins his name, I'll hunt him down and kill him. I swear I will.
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