(no subject)

[palace-travis.livejournal.com]

Takes place after Harry talks to Elijah and the as yet unposted talk with Amy.

"Sin? It's Travis. Did you maybe want to go for a drink? No, never mind. It's probably not a good idea. Can you...oh hell...what am I doing?"

Harry was in the kitchen when he heard his com sound from the other room- indicating that he had a new voice mail message. He listened to the message and called Travis back, frowning.

Travis winced as he saw who was calling. Damn, why had he tried to call him in the first place? He thought about just letting it ring, than sighed and picked it up. "Hello Sin."

"Hey Travis. What's up? You called, but it sounds like you got cut off when you tried to leave a message." Harry tried for subtle.

"I tried to take back that I left the message. I'm sorry, Sin. It's nothing. Forget I called. See you around." Travis hung up.

Harry looked at his com and swore. "Fuck subtle." He checked the call log on his com to see where Travis had been calling from as he walked out the door, closing and locking it behind him. His room. Excellent. Harry hurried to Travis's room, hoping to avoid a wild goose chase around Palace.

Travis got back into bed, curling around Brad's pillow. It still faintly smelled like him. He didn't feel like going anywhere and wondered what made him call Sin.

Harry stopped in front of Travis's door and hammered on it with his left hand. "Travis? Open the fucking door."

Knowing it was little use to ignore the man at the door; Travis got up and opened it. "Shit, Harry. You look like hell."

Harry gently pushed his way into the room, moving Travis politely to the side. "Thanks, mate... glad to see you too."

"Go home Harry. Gods, it looks like you haven't slept for days. I told you it was nothing. I don't even feel like seeing anyone so I don't know why the hell I called you. Go back to bed and I'll do the same."

Harry snorted and flopped down on Travis's bed. "Yeah, like that's gonna happen. I'm on a bed, that'll do for now."

Travis closed his eyes, leaning against the side of the door. "Harry, please go. Honest, it's nothing. I'm sorry I bothered you."

Harry snuggled up into Travis's pillows. "Nope. Comfy now. Staying put. Too tired to get up."

"NO! Not that one." Travis rushed to the bed, grabbing Brad's pillow away from Harry. He stared at him, amazed that he had just done that. "Gods, how pathetic am I?" He slid down to the floor, his back against the bed. Now he really wished Harry wasn't there. "Go, please?"

Harry got up, walked around the bed, and sat down on the floor, next to Travis, back against the bed. "No. I'm sorry, but no. I'm staying here with you."

"I'm afraid of losing him, so I end up doing damn never everything to give him a reason to leave. What's worse, Sin? Losing someone to something you're afraid will happen or losing him cause you're doing what you can to make the something not happen, but it keeps coming out wrong?"

Harry looked at Travis. "It's wrong to not be honest. It's wrong to try and hide your feelings because you think there will be less pain in the long run. It's wrong to not fight for what you believe in."

"I can't fight, not him. I don't know what it is, but...I'm useless when he's around. No, I have a use, for him to get back at my Princess with. It didn't matter when I was the only I had to worry about. Mark can handle it, but Brad...he doesn't deserve it. He's not Dnaran, he has nothing to do with my Princess. But I know that's not going to matter to him. Anything he can use, he will."

He's talking about Jake. Has to be. "Travis, none of us deserve any of this. Sometimes bad things happen, and sometimes bad people happen. You just have to keep moving ahead."

"How do you do that? When I see him, hell, I haven't even seen him yet and I'm already a nervous wreck. I know what he can do and I can't stand to think of that happening to Brad. And if what happened to me the last time happens to him....there's no Mark to make him forget it. Once he gets you it never leaves you, Sin. You never forget by yourself."

Harry sighed. "I'm not saying it's not bad. And I'm not saying not to be scared- I'm scared as hell. He can't hurt me, and I wouldn't care if he could, but he can hurt Orlando. He *has* hurt Orlando. I know how you feel about that."

"Yeah, but Prince Orlando isn't pushing you away is he? And Prince Craig and David are still going thru with the wedding. I'm the only one who's fucking up with the one he loves. Even Mark....he's found a few some ones, it's not stopping him."

Harry put his head on Travis's shoulder. "Then don't. We can't fix the rest- we can deal with it as we go, but it's out of our control. Fix this, Travis. If you love him, don't let him go. What would you rather have- him, or a pillow that smells like him?"

Travis looked down at the pillow, than hugged it to him. "I want him. I want my Brad with me. I just can't get past thinking if he..." Travis blinked back the tears. "I've only got one memory of what happened that time. It's seeing my Princess and Mark's faces. They were so afraid, Sin. Afraid of whatever it was I was doing or going thru or whatever it was. I never want to see that again, and I don't want to be the one having to watch as Brad...It might already be too late. Prince Jake had to have gone to the party. He wouldn't have been able to resist it. And if he saw us..."

"If he saw you then it's too late anyway. Besides, he doesn't need to see you together in order to know that you care about each other. He never saw Orlando and me together and he'd never seen me before. Didn't matter. He found out about me anyway, and cornered me in the lift, asking if I was Harry Sinclair. I'm sorry Travis, but if he's gonna be gunning for you like that, he probably already knows." Harry finished up quietly.

Travis's eyes closed and he started to shake. "My Princess brought a bodyguard from home for Brad. She's supposed to get him to safety if Prince Jake sees him. My Princess and Mark thought that would it better, easier for me. I thought it would. But at the party....I kept looking for him. Even as Brad was talking to me, couldn't help it. He told me not to worry and I said I wouldn't. Then I looked around the room again. I couldn't face Brad. I said something and went to my Princess. Later....later I saw Brad. Milla was carrying him, he had gotten so drunk he'd passed out. Cause of me. Cause I couldn't stop...."

Harry shook his head. "Travis, that was Brad's choice. This is something very difficult for you, and you're trying. You need to try harder, and so does Brad. Remember- he's empathic... he's going to pick up people's emotions, and they're going to affect him stronger than they would a normal person. And you're still getting used to this bodyguard idea... give yourself time." Harry snorted. "Gods- you me and Anna... all trying to save the whole world at the same time. We should have jackets made."

"My Princess, she's getting close to...having him not be a problem anymore. I don't have her talent to do that. I just have myself. To make sure no one else gets hurt. I don't even have my talent. I shut it down soon as I heard he was here. What he thinks...wants..." Travis shivered.

"What do you mean? What is Anna going to do, Travis?" Harry moved past the rest of what Travis has said to focus on this.

"She was talking to herself, thought I was asleep. She was mad." He pointed to spots on the floor and wall where singe marks could be seen. "Cause of the last time he attacked her, she's lost some control on her Talent. Gets out when she gets mad. Talked about Prince Christian. A plan of his. Said better happen soon." Travis looked at Harry. "Or Dnara won't have a Prince."

Harry put his head in his hands. "Oh fucking hell. Travis, she can't. She can't kill him. I know she's a soldier, and I'm not saying she isn't capable. Hell, I'm not even saying it's a bad idea. But it would affect the way she related to her family for the rest of her life. Does Christian..." Harry paused for a moment, then made himself go on. This is bigger than his feud with Christian. "Does he know about this? Because he should."

"I don't know. She sounded like she was sending him a message, but don't know if she sent it. She means it, Harry. If he gave her enough of a reason, or just one that she thought was enough of one..."

"I know. I didn't say I didn't think she was serious. Fuck." Harry reached into his pocket, scrolled through his address book and dialed. "I'm sorry Travis."

Travis watched Harry, sighing as he realized what was going to happen. "Careful, Sin. What you saw her do that first day was her in control, not mad."

Harry rolled his eyes. "I'm not going to start bossing around the royals, Travis... I'm not THAT stupid." Harry waited for Anna to pick up.

Anna crumbled up the letter and threw it on the ground, joining the other papers. She couldn't think of how best to ask her Mother about moving to Palace. She would have called, but sending a letter gave her more time to prepare for the conversation that would follow. She blindly reached for the phone. "Hello"

"Anna! It's Harry... I'm in Travis's room. What say you move your cute little arse there and have a chat with us, hmm? See you soon, love." Harry hung up and looked at Travis. "Was that a bad choice?"

Anna stared at the phone, than hung it up. Harry? In Travis's room? And what kind of chat....cute little ass? She left her room, making her way to Travis's.

"She'll be wondering at first what you want, so have a little time. I hope you know what you're doing."

"What- I'm supposed to have a plan or something? I'm tired and punchy and frustrated... and not at you, so don't go there, okay. It'll be fine. She's like Orlando in a lot of ways. Except for the random acts of violence. That is less like Orlando."

Travis reached for Harry's hand, squeezing it. He jumped when he heard the loud banging on his door a little bit later.

Harry looked at Travis. "She moves fast! Did you lock the door behind me?"

Travis shook his head, just as the door opened. Anna saw Harry first, her eyebrow rising. "Cute little arse, Sin?" Than she saw Travis. "Trav? What's the matter?" She went to him, pulling him toward her. "It's last night, isn't it?"

Travis only nodded, still holding on to the pillow.

"Fair's fair, Anna... and I thought Travis could use more than just me here. Besides, I need to talk to both of you a little."

"Oh, Travis. I told you Brad's going to be safe with Milla. Jake won't hurt him." Anna began to rock him back and forth as she looked at Harry. "About what?"

"To start with, about Jake."

"What about him?" Anna's attention was back on Travis, running her hand thru his hair. "I'm sorry you saw him like that, Travis. Have you tried to call him today? Or Milla to see how he is?"

Travis shook his head as he held her tight. "I couldn't. Not after...."

"I told Travis that what Brad chose to do isn't Travis's fault. I'm gonna be backed up on that, right?" Harry cut in.

"Travis, look at me." Anna lifted his head to face her. "It wasn't your fault. You have too much to deal with and Brad's picking up on that. It got to him and he didn't know how to cope so he drank. And I bet he's sorry he did. Talk to him, Travis. Tell him how much you need him. How much you love him and want to be with him."

"Why would he want me now? I told him I wouldn't worry and I did. I love him so much, my Princess. And I can't think how to not run away."

"You will. And he will help. But you have to let him. Give him the chance to show you what he's willing to do. Don't make the decision for him."

"See? Can you believe it when there are two of us saying the same general thing. Give him a chance, Travis. He's more than just a pretty face and a good fuck, and you know it."

"Travis...could you...could you deal with facing Himself and having Brad not know how you feel? Having him wonder where he stands with you, if he even does. Always wonder if he could have done something to help you and never knowing."

Travis squeezed his eyes shut, trying to stop the tears. "No, couldn't...want him...can't have him not know. Oh Gods, my Princess. Have to...Will he? Take me back? Have to try...don't I?"

"Just be honest with him and stop pushing him away, Travis. Gods, if everyone would just listen to me and go with what's true... it's the right approach 99.999% of the time." Harry gave Travis a little poke.

"Go to him, Travis. Ask him to take you back. Get everything out between you now, don't leave anything to chance. Call me if you have to, but I'm betting you won't. Please Travis? For me?"

Travis bit his lip as he looked from Harry to his Princess and back again. Nodding, he gave her a hug, than one to Harry before getting up off the floor. One last look at Brad's pillow as he put it down on the bed, than he left, closing the door softly behind him.

Harry looked at Anna. "Just us now. So Travis told me something he didn't mean to while he was upset."

Anna watched her boy leave, than sat on the bed with a sigh. "Please let this work, please let it work." She said under her breath. "What did he say?" Still distracted by thoughts of Travis and Brad.

"You were talking when you thought he was sleeping. And now he thinks Dnara is going to be down by one prince."

Anna's head turned with a snap to look at Harry, than she looked away, no expression on her face. "And? What about it?"

Harry got up off the floor and stood. "You think I don't understand the sentiment, Anna? I'm the only one he can't touch, and I'm standing here trying to figure out how I can stand in between him and all the people I love so no one will get hurt. Sound familiar? I was telling Travis that you me and him need to have jackets made."

"He can't touch you. He won't touch me, because of what I almost did to him before. What I should.... Where are you going with this Harry?"

"Finish your sentence, Anna... then I'll finish my thought."

Anna slowly turned her head, staring at him. "What I should have done." No change in her expression or voice.

Harry moved to stand in front of Anna. "Say it god dammit. It's like sex- if you're old enough to do it, you're old enough to call it by name. So say it Anna. What should you have done."

"I shouldn't have called my fire back. I should have pulled him closer to me instead of pushing him away. I should have made him burn for what he was doing." She stood as fire sprung up behind Harry. "You want me to say it, Harry? Fine! I should have killed Jake before it got this far. Before what he did to my boys and before he had a chance to come back here. Happy, Harry?! Satisfied?!" The fire rose as her voice did.

"Anna... listen to yourself. Look around and see what you're doing. You're setting Travis's room on fire. Again. Because of what you're letting Jake do to you. Take a beat and stop." Harry spoke quietly and steadily, not reacting to the fire around him.

"Take a beat and stop!! That's all I do, that's all any of us do. We stop and we don't do anything and it gets worse. HE gets worse. I'm tired of stopping. It's not doing anything! Not stopping a fucking thing, only letting people who don't deserve it get hurt. I don't want to 'take a beat and stop'!!"

"Anna... the fire is getting closer. You're going to hurt me. You need to stop now." Harry shouted Anna's name, and a hint of frustration, pain and fear came into the rest of his words as the flames licked near Harry's skin. Despite this, Harry stood his ground.

Anna started, looking around the room. The fire had arched around Harry, giving him no chance to get away. Eyes widening as she realized how close the fire was to him already, she called it back all at once. Sitting down hard on the bed from the force of its returning, she shook for a moment as she adjusted. "God, Harry."

Harry took a few deep breaths to calm himself down. "I'm okay. I don't even think I'm singed. You?"

Anna nodded. "The fire doesn't hurt me. Just pulled it back faster than usually do. Like being hit in the chest." She looked around at the damage to Travis's room. "Now I really hope he makes up with Brad. Need to be somewhere while I get this cleaned up."

"I think he'll deal. Anna... look what almost happened. Jake wasn't even in the room, and you lost control. You almost hurt me. You go after him, he's not gonna be the only one who gets hurt. Or killed." Harry's voice was quiet.

"You made me mad, like he will. Just by standing in front of me he'll make me mad. If it's just me and him...then he will be the only one to get hurt. And he'll deserve it. It's cause of him I can't control it like Christian taught me to."

"What if he's standing in front of you, his arms around someone you love and he makes you mad. What then, Anna? I know you don't know me that well, but the flames were inches from me, and you didn't stop. Not when you should have."

"He's afraid of the fire. He'd-" Anna stopped. She was about to say the fire would make Jake let whoever go, but they might make him hold on tighter instead. Her hands shook a little as she brought them up to her face.

"Anna... c'mere." Harry held his arms out.

Anna bit her lip as she walked over to Harry, pretending she was just making sure he was alright and not burned. Than she stepped into his arms, taking deep breaths to keep from crying. "I'm so sorry, Harry."

"It's okay Firecracker. I provoked you into that intentionally, and I'm sorry about that. But you needed to say it out loud. And you need to realize why whatever happens with Jake... it can' t be you that does it.

"I'm sorry I almost hurt you, but I'm not sorry for wanting to do that to him. For what he's done to us. I just want it to stop. All of it to just be over with."

"I'm not asking you to be sorry for that, Anna... you think I don't want him dead for what he's done to you - what he's still doing? But you can't do it love. You just can't. Look what it's already doing to you."

"If I was the one who did it, than it would be over. It wouldn't be doing this to me. I wouldn't have to worry for the first time in forever it seems. Not have to make sure my door is locked before I go to bed. Can just relax and not be afraid for once."

"And how would that affect your relationship with your brothers. With Marton and your Mother. Long term, how would it affect you if you killed Jake. It's not worth it, Anna. He's not worth it. You're only 22, and I know you're a soldier, and I'm not trying to tell you that you're some little girl who can't handle violence or bloodshed. But as much as I wish to god it wasn't true that fuckstick is your brother, and their brother and your father's son. And a Prince of the realm. We have to find another way."

"Christian's plan, you mean. Whatever it is. So more waiting and hoping and wishing. For we don't know how long." Anna looked up at Harry. "I checked, Harry. Punishment for killing a member of the Royal Family of Dnara is death. Even for another Royal."

Harry spoke very quietly. "I know, Anna. I checked too. And I'd do it myself before I let you be the one. And I don't know what his plan is either."

Anna sighed. "I don't know if I can wait. But it looks like I don't have a choice. I don't think Himself will wait til I get back in control again. Have to have Mother send me the lessons Christian gave me before."

"You don't. And I need to ask you a favor."

"I guess I owe you one." Anna pulled back, looking around the room again. "Name it."

"I... I have to leave for about a week. I'm leaving in a few days." Harry hadn't told anyone about this yet.

"You're what?" Anna looked at him, stunned. "A week, Harry? Where the hell are you going? You have to leave now. Fuck Harry what for?"

"I don't want to. But I have to. A friend of mine was murdered, and David and I think his murderer is after a girl here at Palace. The investigation has stalled out, and they aren't getting anywhere. I'm going to the funeral, and I'm going a few days early, and staying a few days after to see what I can find out." Harry spoke as calmly as he could, but the exhaustion in his voice still came through.

The sound of his voice made Anna really look at him. "God Harry. Sit down." She pulled him to the bed. "What the fuck have you been going thru?" Her hand went to his face, as if he were Travis. "You look like hell. And you're dealing with me and Travis. You should be in bed, letting my brother take care of you."

"Orlando's sick. And I'm just tired. I'm not sleeping well. But that's the favor I wanted... Please make sure that Orlando is okay while I'm gone. Check in on him, make sure he's taking Tyler with him when he's going places. Okay?" Harry let Anna manhandle him.

"Of course I will. Every hour if you want me to. Orli's sick? It's not....how'd he take it when you told him you were leaving?"

"I haven't. I was waiting for him when Travis called me. I've only talked to David, Amy and you two. And before you yell at me, this isn't the way we normally do things... he usually knows before anyone."

"It better not be." Anna sighed again. "I'm not going to ask why you're not sleeping, doubt you'd tell me. But I hope whatever it is passes soon. Don't like to see members of my family like this. Well, most of my family. Want me to take you back to Orli's?"

"Don't you need to wait for Travis?" Harry kept his head down, played out.

Anna shook her head. "He's fixed on Brad right now. He won't come back til he's forgiven or me or Mark goes for him. And I need to go to my room anyway. Come on." Standing, Anna managed to get Harry to his feet, his arm around her shoulders.

Harry turned to look at Anna, letting her direct him from the room. "Can you promise me two things, Firecracker?"

"Anything, Sin. I promise."

"Look after Orlando when I'm gone, like you said."

"Of course. What's the other thing?"

"Don't do anything to Jake while I'm gone. Protect everyone however you have to. But don't kill him. No matter what."

Anna stopped, staring up at Harry for a moment. Than looking down, she nodded her head and continued down the hall with him.

"I know how hard that was. Thank you. I owe you one now, Anna." Harry spoke quietly, walking beside Anna.

"Fine, get yourself better, from whatever it is. Whatever it takes. And by the time you get back, Christian will be ready to talk again about whatever you slugged him for, if you need to."

Harry didn't break his stride, but his head whipped to the side to look at Anna. "Don't know what you're talking about. We both got hurt because of the raid."

"Don't lie to me, Harry. I told you, youngest kid has to deal with the older ones. And part of that is figuring out what you aren't told. Add that to being in a family of Receptives who talk around you while you're in the room. Not going to ask, just saying."

Harry growled to himself. "Goddammit."

"Yeah, and did I mention Craig asked me to move to Palace, for good? That's what I was doing when you called. Writing a letter to Mother asking permission. Father already said yes."

This time it was Harry stopping them dead. "You're staying? For good! Oh Firecracker that's amazing! Harry picked Anna up in his arms and swung her around in a circle.

"Sin!" Anna yelled in surprise as she was spun around. She tried to give him a stern look, about to tell him the same thing she had told Christian. But he looked so happy she couldn't. "It's not official yet, Sin. Have to get Mother's permission. And I'm not sure how I feel about changing allegiances. So right now it's just a long visit."

"Don't care. I like you, and you make Orlando happy. So it's all good, no matter what you call it." Harry placed Anna back on the ground and gave her a kiss on the nose, taking her hand and continuing down the hall.

Anna couldn't keep the smile from her face. "Thanks, Sin. That means a lot to me." She squeezed his hand as they walked, then stopped him to kiss him on the cheek. "And since I'm probably the last of everyone, welcome to the family."

Harry glared at Anna, mostly kidding, and stomped down the hall to Orlando's room.

She walked him to his door, to make sure he did go in. "You get what rest you can, Sin. And remind Orli we're right across the hall, so if he needs anything anytime he can call on us. Take care of yourself and him. I'm sure I'll run into you before you leave, but just to be sure." She kissed him again. "For luck."

"For luck. Thank you Anna. Thanks for taking care of my boy. Make sure someone takes care of you."

"I will, and you too. Love you Harry." Anna looked at him before going inside her room.

"Love you Anna. I love your whole family. Take care." Harry walked back inside Orlando's room, pulling the door shut tight behind him.